Fort Jackson-Eastover-Hopkins-Gettin' Lost-Ride: Country Grammar

Well, maybe it's time to invest in a Garmin 705 with City Navigator software (it's COMP6100 in case you're following along in your catalog!) as this past Sunday's road ride went from 50 something planned miles to 70 something not-so-planned-not-enough-water-bottles-ride. It was cloudy and sad, but then the sun came out and everything turned into a technicolor happiness tsunami! But that happiness had a warm, seedy, sweaty underbelly known as dehydration. Luckily I thought ahead and filled one bottle with Lemon Lime Heed (FOOD5060 for those of you still following along in your catalogs). Ah Heed, the sublime deliciousness of cat barf infused with plumber's caulk... AND it gets results (results may vary). So to make a long story truncated, The Blog missed a turn in Hopkins and refusing to swallow its bilious pride tried to navigate back to the original route on a series of backroads, each more sinister looking and crystal meth smelling than the last! As Jim Snyder put it, when the locals peered out at me from their lairs, they bellowed in unison, "MEAT!!!!!!"