The Venerable BEAD?

Mike Watt used to have a sign in the window of his tour van (The Boat) that said "Life is just a bowl of porkchops" [blog post 7-9-09] and for some reason, I though it a fitting title for Josh and Jose's ride. From Saturday's Tour De Midlands, in Joshie's words:
Well, there we were, just kinda rolling along without a care in the world, harmonizing on some super-fresh Boyz 2 Men a capella stylings when I heard a loud BANG! Instantly I clutched my chest and checked my palm for the telltale scarlet liquid and the white hot searing pain that usually accompanies assassin's gun shot wounds. Luckily, I was unscathed but to my right Jose was clutching HIS chest, in a "THIS IS THE BIG ONE, ELIZABETH I'M COMIN' TO SEE YOU!"-Fred Sanford sort of way as he rolled to a stop. Upon closer inspection with los ojos no less, Jose's Challenge road tire had blown a bead off the rim. Apparently, the bead chose the 30 mile mark of the ride to disintegrate into shreds.

We somehow got a hold of Tim from Cycle Center and he looked at Jose, then looked at Jose's shredded bead, then looked at Jose, then looked at a secluded patch of trees, then looked back at Jose, then looked at a clown wig, velvet blindfold and zip-loc bag of gravy, then looked at Jose, then Jose looked at me, beseechingly, then I looked at the secluded patch of trees and then back at Jose. Well, to make along story short, we got Jose on a Michelin Dynamic after some more haggling and signing of confidentiality agreements and he was able to finish the ride. Many thanks to Tim and many thanks to Jose for being a good sport. He insisted I come over, hang out and "scrapbook the night away" but I had to pretend I had some sort of serious appointment in the morning. God help me if he ever finds out I think his scrapbooking is borderine creep-tastic...

Tears, tears and screaming followed by whimpering:
Tim and Jose come to a "gentleman's agreement":