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Wednesday, June 16, 2010

You Have Lunch, We Have LUNCHEON!

Brian Orloff of vendor powerhouse Sigma Sport is known by many names. Some call him Brian, others, Orloff, and a few refer to him as Brian Orloff (and the ultra rare anagram "Born For Fail", first seen on his kindergarten report card). Around these parts, he is simply known as "The Man Who Saved Lunch on June 16th, 2010". Apparently, Mr. Orloff, still reeling from the effects of an all-night ether binge at Clamdiggers, mis-texted a missive to Sigma product manager Sandy Emmanuel this morning along these lines: "Sandrew. Yo. Gonna blow up tha spot with like, i dunno, 33 pizzas for Hawley. Peace" 9 hours later, a line of pizzas not dissimilar to Hannibal's war elephant caravan through the Alps descended upon the "S" aisle in the warehouse to raucous applause and cavorting. King Edward, shipping department Noid, danced a furious jig then consumed an entire bottle of Stan's sealant in his excitement and is now tripping the light fantastic as these words are typed. In honor of today's event, we have a created a Sigma Pizza Mandala to honor Brian's generosity. Grazie!

Pay careful attention to the lumbering figure in the background. His name is Adam Rickard. He works in the shipping department. He is, seriously, seven feet and four inches tall. He weighs, 151 pounds. His parents are Kaminoans, the same folk who cloned Jango Fett. He likes to yell "epic!" at The Blog which never fails to elicit a guffaw...

2 comments:

The Clawhammer Cyclist said...

impressive pizzas. impressive.

Spankye said...

indeed...that's a lot of pie.