New Product from Sea Otter

Just a few cool new products we saw this year at Sea Otter...

2008 Rival Shifters

2008 Rival Cranks

2008 Rival Derraileurs

2008 Manitou Dorado

And my personal favorite

Kyle, rest easy young hipster

Kyle, graphics lackey, finally got his precious Soma toeclips. A collective sigh of relief was audible throughout the office, warehouse and surrounding counties. By the way hapless blog reader, it's Friday, it's sunny, it's going to be 82 degrees and we're gonna be riding after work. Yippee! It don't get no better...

Ian's Wild Ride

As of Wednesday morning, Ian (overlord and supreme chancellor of the Hawley Service Center) has re-entered the bicycle commuter pool, so let that be a warning to all cell phone-talking, non attention-paying, make-up applying, contact lense-cleaning, wreckless driving knucklehead troglodytes populating the local roads because if you anger the man above in the day-glo safety vest and ill-fitting cycling bibs, you will bring a wrath upon you of biblical proportions. And yes, he's riding a Storck. And no Kyle, you can't have his front wheel for your fixie delusions of grandeur...

Team Hawley Baker's Dozen 2008 Re-Cap

As told by somebody who wasn't there:
Kenny: Hey Jess, this is Kenny. Calling you from the beach to ask how the race is going...uh, gimme a call back when you get this.
(later that day)
Kenny: Hey Jess, Kenny once again. It's really sunny out here, the beach is wonderful. How's the race going? Are you there? Does anybody answer their F*&$# phone anymore? Ciao!
(later that evening)
[you have ONE new message]
Jessica: Hi Kenny. Wellll, it rained the entire time. They rain delayed the start, then by noon, they had another rain delay. The race was called after 3 hours. To top it off, as we were packing up, the sun came out and the rain clouds left. Kyle wrecked. Tony wrecked before the race when he hit a cone in the road. Josh didn't blow up. Super-boring. Have a good day!

Derrick's New Saddle!

Derrick built this stealthy Storck for "Gimme a Break" matriarch Nell Carter, but alas, shes switched over to competitive weightlifting/binge-drinking. The bike itself weighs 16 pounds, but the saddle adds another 8. And yes, Derrick prefers his handlebars without tape thank you very much Mr. blog reader!!!!

Wes of Sunshine Cycles (Athens/Watkinsville) and his Ridley Damocles

Tony Zanca (of inside sales fame, the man you love to hate, aka Teenwolf, the All-American Heartbreaker, Manimal, the man unable to turn the big ring) sent me this lovely build from our friends at Sunshine Cycles in Athens/Watkinsville. Big ups to Wes (and to his peeps) for the gangsta-fresh build. Dig that crazy custom paint job! See ya'll at the Twilight Crit!!!
Build specs (all parts from Hawley, except for the frame-sorry!):
2008 Ridley Damocles “Large”
LiquidCycling.com paintjob
15.87 lbs.
SRAM Red group (compact, 11-23)
Selle Italia Thoork Team Edition
FSA SL-K post
FSA Energy Alu bars 44cm
FSA OS115 White 120mm stem
American Classic 420 silver w/ceramic bearings (non-bladed spokes)
Schwable Stelvio EVO (front/rear specific)
Speedplay Zero Stainless White
SRAM Super Cork tape
Cateye Strada

Lunchbox of the Month

Ok boys and girls, go put your artwork in your cubbies and come sit down on the magic mat. Today we have a new student starting and we want everyone to see his lunchbox. O'doyle, if I see you lay one finger on him or even try to barter for his twinkie, it's off to the Principal's office for you. With all this anticipation growing, you've got to be wondering to whom this tiny box of joy must belong to. Well, if you think you have the courage, drag your mouse atop the following link and proceed to clicking...

Who dat lunchy box belong to?

"Ya'll sell cats?" Yeah, We Got 'Em!

Okay Okay!

ONE MORE 24" WHEEL TO LOOK AT... THE SUN RINGLE 4 STROKE!

El Jefè

(Thursday, 10:31 AM Hawley Company Mothership)
Derrick: Steve, Bob called. The warehouse is in flames, Andy sold all the Storck frames for a bag of magic beans, Dave has locked himself in the women's bathroom and refuses to come out until Duran Duran writes a song about unicorns and Tony is considering gender modification surgery through a clinic in Bolivia. Oh, and NASA sent us an email about an imminent asteroid impact within, oh, I dunno, 45 minutes.


Steve:

Answer 24" Cruiser Wheels

Josh is laid back, like a valium that just ate a muscle relaxer while sipping a whiskey drink in a jacuzzi. So when I showed him these wheels, he made an exclamation of sorts (a kind of gurgle and then a raised eyebrow,) and furiously started doing the algorithmic calculations in his head that would allow him to buy them without his wife's knowledge and still have all genitalia left in tact... Feast your eyes you worthless half-wits!

Baker's Dozen 13 Hour Endurance Race...

Is rained out for this weekend. Jiminy Crickets!!! The Hawley Company had a fairly gi-normous crew of maniacs committed including: Jim, Josh, Tony, Jose, Carmen, Will, Kenny, Pastor Troy, Eric (formerly of Hawley, now Cane Creek deckhand) and his ole lady Kelly B. NOT TO MENTION the world debut of Andy "Does that spaghetti strap tank top come in fushcia?" Hale and the Storck Bicycles van of mystery and delight. Oh well, the race has been rescheduled for next Saturday, but Andy and the mystery machine will be on its way to Sea Otter!

Hawley Burrito Ride!!!

The group rolls out. Will alerts the media... First mishap of the night as Liz gets a lesson from Tandemonium...
Josh dominates Ole Blue in the Yo Burrito parking lot...
Beer and burritos in bellies, we cruise the streets in search of hijinks...
Yes Liz, we agree with your sentiments...
The young lovers... Notice the shame on Kyle's face as his ole lady shows him up....

from last Thursday (3/27)

Race to the River

COMMUTER BIKE OF THE WEEK...

3:02 AM, Wednesday
(phone rings)
Kenny: Hello?
Tony Zanca: Kenny, it's Tony!
Kenny: Huh?
Tony Zanca: From Hawley!
Kenny: You got the wrong number.
(click)

3:04 AM
(phone rings)
Kenny: Hello?
Tony Zanca: Listen to me very carefully. Are you riding into work tomorrow???
Kenny: Well, yeah. Sure!
Tony Zanca: Are you riding Perfect Pink?
Kenny: Naw, I'll be riding Ole Blue
Tony Zanca: What?!
Kenny: Ole Blue
Tony Zanca: Oh God, oh God, oh God! Well, that means I'm taking the bus into work. Like a
man with no arms, I can't hang. You feelin' me bro-seph??? That bike will totally
dominate me and everything I hold dear. I'll be with my priest if you need me.
(gibberish)
Kenny: Ciao!

(ed. note) This bike belongs to Eric Smith, now of Cane Creek, formerly of Hawley and is currently on loan because Eric is too weak to ride it on the hills of Sm'ashville. Thats right Eric, I said it. Now come over and git yer whompin'

Happy Easter!

Take your chocolate bunny and cram it with walnuts because we're all about the eggs and subsequent coloring of said eggs. Did anybody say vinegar and food coloring? Yummers! Now thats a balanced diet suitable for even the pansiest of roadie food snobs. By the way, buy some Campy stuff because a giant rabbit said so. Better yet, taste the rainbow so to speak and purchase the many colorful bobbles and trinkets manufactured by our friends at Straitline. The word for today is RAINBOW! You've been warned sucka!

FSA Wheelset, as pictured online...

Village of White Fat Trolls

Oh if I only had a nickle for everytime I've seen this message on the back of a car. Where might you ask is this guy from? None other than the Village of Fat White Trolls. (Actual photo taken on the way back from lunch in front of the Hawley Office) Gotta love Red Bank, SC!

COMMUTER BIKE OF THE WEEK...

.. belongs to Will, a newly-hired bit of fresh meat in our warehouse abattoir. I don't know a single thing about Will (yet), but if any inkling of his personality can be gleaned from his commuting steed, then I would guess he enjoys long walks in the park, light jazz and bear skin rugs, shirtless hand to hand combat with "bi-polar "Yeti's (abominable snowmen for our South American readers), shots of Georgia moonshine out of tumblers handcrafted from enchanted moon rocks, viciously head-butting Galapagos turtles at the petting zoo for the criminally insane, listening to various incantations for the resurrection of unholy demon spawn in his I-Pod and hunting down, killing with his bare hands and feasting upon the raw flesh of the world famous Pelion Kudzu Werewolf. That being said, Will's bike is a Litespeed frame, a Lemond fork and 110 percent IN-YOUR-FACE! Have fun eating your doughnuts and hog jowl candy bars fatty-fat-fat because Will and his bike are coming to stomp a mudhole in your non-commuting reality! Commuter of the week in tha house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Asheville Retreat, Days 2 & 3

Me again. I really didn't do too much on my second day here. Basically I drove around buying everything that I forgot to bring with me. Really that's pretty sad because if you saw my car when I left, you would think that 4 people were heading up for a month. Nope, just me... for a week.

Day 2 started with me having to get a card reader for my digimon, uh, digital camera, so I took off for Best Buy which resides in a valley giving one of the best views of the western NC Apps. Pretty Ironic, I'll have to take a pic for you guys tomorrow. After that I headed off for a quick trip to Diamond Brand and then to Frugal Backpacker to play with a lot of outdoor gear that I will probably never be able to afford. Then I stopped by Liberty Bicycles to pick up a new seatpost clamp as my current clamp was on the verge of catastrophic failure. I didn't want to be halfway up a climb, have the clamp break, and then be screwed. So yea, that was pretty much my Tuesday, spending money not for neat new toys but for fixing bikes and replacing stuff I already own. lame.

Wednesday I slept in late, which was awesome! When I finally awoke, I took a little scoot to the West End Bakery for a little brunch. I know it may be lame to some of you guys, but I really like scooters. They're fun. After that I decided that I should visit our dear friends at Cane Creek and talk Eric into leaving a little early for a road bike ride. After several minutes of hecking, he finally agreed. We took off for an afternoon ride into the city and up Old Toll Road. I was fortunate enough to snag a Storck Fascenario 0.7 demo bike for a little "product testing" (okay, so really I just wanted to ride a 15 lb. bike instead of my 24 lb. Hakkalugi.) I have to say, the Fascenario is one hell of a mountain climbing machine! At a not so lanky 220 lbs., I wouldn't say that riding bike up mountains are my most favorite thing. However, this bike made it fun and way way too easy. needless to say I was pretty impressed. I will now be accepting donations for the "how the heck can I get one of these fund." Maybe not the best bike for everything, but if you want to go up or down a mountain really, really fast this is where is at. In other news, Toll Road is amazingly beautiful. Once you get near the top you get an amazing view of the city of Asheville with Mt. Pisgah. pretty, very pretty. Well, that's basically my Day 3;. Can't wait until tomorrow! Peace.

Lunchbox of the Month

If you can guess to whom this glorious bag of grub belongs to, you win your choice of a cookie from said bag, or this old banana we found under Andy's desk.

Asheville Retreat, Day 1

Well another catalog finally in the books. Phew! In an effort to de-stress from all the hectic happenings that get bundled into making a rather large (okay, well it's not Q big, but anyway it's big to me) catalog, I've taken off the week and headed up to Asheville, NC. Oh Asheville, how I love thee. Pisgah Mountains, Blue ridge Parkway, Bent Creek, Barley's, what's not to love here. So here I am, got here yesterday, crashing at my dear friends', Eric & Kelly. We pretty much immediately loaded up my car, A.K.A Eleanor, and headed out to Bent Creek for a mountain ride. Did I mention I love it here. Bent Creek is an excellent trail system. You can find trails here that are supremely calm or supremely insane. We chose a little of both, starting on the North Boundary trail, a calm 6-mile fire road climb, and then turning back down the mountain onto the Green's Lick Trail. Green's Lick is probably one of the funnest trails I have ever ridden, uh ever. It is basically a descending BMX track for 2-3 miles. Nothing very technical, just wide open go as fast as you can without peeing your pants (which I'm pretty sure I did anyway.). Needless to say it was a blast and I felt lucky to still be alive. What to do tomorrow...?






P.S. Eric and Kelly are open to donations for fresh new eyewear.

COMMUTER BIKE OF THE WEEK...

...belongs to Kyle McNasty of Graphics/Toddler Cycling Outreach Program. Now that the catalog is complete, Kyle decided to wipe off the dust and cobwebs from his Fuji and make a half-hearted attempt at commuting into work. Half-hearted you say? Well, here is a transcript from a secretly recorded conversation I had with Kyle while waiting for our Hot Pockets to warm up. Acquaint thyselves!!!!
Kenny: Wellity, wellity, wellity!
Kyle: ?
Kenny: Wellity!
Kyle: Baaaaaa
Kenny: Look who decided to climb off his aristocratic high horse and join the unwashed, working class cockroaches who ride into work every morning!
Kyle: I can have cookie?
Kenny: You can have all the cookies you want my blue-blooded, halfwitted, absinthe-drinking, badminton-playing, cycling robber baron!!!
Kyle: Me need diaper! Me need diaper!
Kenny: Bah! Curse your feeble brain!!! It's like talking to a--
Kyle: Daddy?
Kenny: Good day, sir
Kyle: I make cookie poop!!!